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Addictions: De-addicting the Victims

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• Partner is a crack user, keeps promising to stop [1] 6/3 05:16pm

• If you don't use cocaine or any drugs at all can cocaine get in to your system just being involved with your spouse? [4] 2/12 10:39am

• How long does crack cocaine stay in your system? [56] 2/9 11:11pm

• Addictions how to de addict [20] 2/9 11:35pm

• He's addicted to coke [1] 1/20 05:12pm

• Please help me with Husbands addictive behavior [33] 1/19 09:17am

• Computer Addiction [28] 1/19 01:23am

• HOW LONG DOES HERION STAY IN YOUR SYSTEM [15] 12/12 12:50pm

• How do i get wife, who will dress for me at home. Go out to a pub or club and act out our role play [2] 11/19 08:35am

• Does life have to be sad all the time? [1] 12/31 09:08pm

• Ex Addict living with Using Addict [18] 10/17 12:23pm

• MEN WHO ARE ADDICTED TO TV. [2] 6/17 11:59pm

• Archive through August 23, 2001 [7] 8/23 07:16pm

• Archive through May 24, 2002 [6] 5/24 09:04pm

Join the most exciting new community on Family issues. You will like it. idealFamily.Com - Discuss family issues Life styles household, housekeeping and secrets to family life

IdealFamily.com is a clean community for all moms, dads and members of family who want to live a loving, fulfilling life. Please join it free and share your love. Win new friends and receive plenty of blessings and love.

my wife is addicted to hydrocodone.it makes her very ill at certain times and sometimes she seems very happy.could someone please offer some advice?

You may ask her or write her what is her motivation behind the consumption?
You could suggest her alternatives with something natural by putting those alternatives near the stuff she is used to take.

mod.

find me agirl that I can merry .
I want to merry her.

Dear All !!


Dr X is correct - Its all in the Mind . If you are determined you can make impossible Possible.
Certainly 10 step programme may help you , if you are sure that you want to climb up on the ladder of recovery.Dont be disheartened coz of your troubled past - this is life all about , but it does not mean that one need to ruin one, rather take that as challenge and try to overcome . You are What you make of yourself.


FOR ANGIE AND JAY :

As anyone with a drug problem will tell you, it is the support of someone close that's got them through the bad times. It's well worth the effort on both sides -- just being there for someone in need can make a real difference.If you're worried about talking, write them a letter. . Ask questions beginning How, When, What, Where. It'll get the conversation moving and you won't simply get a Yes or No answer.

YOU CAN ONLY MAKE A DIFFERENCE To OTHERS LIFE _ SO JAY N ANGIE GIVE IT YOUR BEST SHOT.

Giving up Drugs is difficult and i have seen that NA programme even fails. A friend of mine was an addict - Though he was a good person , but he would behave dangerously dangerous under the effect of Narcotics- I knew that this was not him but the effect of drugs inside him - that was responsible for his shocking behaviour.He had been to jail for a year in Singapore , was on streets for 6 months ,he treated every one badly , i was there with him all along with a hope that he will come clean one day ~ Its 3 yrs now and he is all clean - HE IS A TRANSFORMED MAN. So one has to be very very sensible with this kind of people.

ABOUT STEVE : Steve may be right it is extremely difficult to deal with this kind of people. I have seen the chances for recovery are very very less... but that does not mean there is NO HOPE .Being humancentric and being hopeful are the only answer. The Topic is extremely important , so i will be back with more information on how to deal with the Crisis. LIT YOUR HOPE, COZ DARKNESS Vanishes... once you are lit from within.

tt, There is nothing in this world thats impossible, if u think u can do it.it is your determination, if u think u r weak, u feel more weaker.u have to build self conciousness,it is your feeling,thinking that u cann`t do anything without those painkillers,

u r assuming there is something in that tablets.actually the tablets u take there is nothing,it just made of of wheatflour,just because u think there is something in it that give u energy,no u r wrong, do not depend on that,u have power to over come such feelings,mind is stronger than anything.

if u want to try,tell someone to give that painkillers everyday and ask them to change similar tab, one of those days,and tell them which day u felt weaker,if u can,

try this
u can make it coz it is in your mind,not in tablets.

it doesnt matter who i am...i have been hooked on hydrocodone(painkillers) for two years; i feel like i have no energy when i dont take them in the morning and throughout the day; i want help and the best appraoch to overcoming this...any advice?

i lost everything cos i started seeing a girl who was a heroin addict and crack user if someone wants to email me and talk i will be here

I too was deeply in love with a woman who was a crack addict. She went to rehab, NA meetings even a year in jail but nothing got her to stop. The whole time I was telling her that our relationship was in danger of ending because of her usage. Finally I took my own advice and ended our relationship. I cried alot and was worried about her future, but I was worried about my future, my job, and my sanity - her usage became unbearable to me no matter if she went a month clean I came to realize she wasn't going to stop. My advice to anyone involved with an addict is to give them time and an opportunity to take their recovery seriously and if they don't clean up KICK THEM OUT OF YOUR LIFE no matter how painful that may be. Remember drugs destroy the addict and the family involved - there are no exceptions!

My mate is a crack addict. I met him at work, he had a good job, we clicked quickly and fell in love. We grew up in the same area but I didnt know much about him. After I fell in love with him and we started to run into people we both new people started to tell me that he was a dope head. He told me he used to sniff coke. I didnt know how to deal with that but I continued to love him. He was arrested and I waited for him for eighteen months. I mean I stood by this mans side like no one has ever done for him. We never lived together until he came home. And we he finally got here he treated me so cold. After three weeks I kicked him out. He would always sleep over, but lately he is looking funny. Well last week he started to disappear, and come back all dirty and smelly. His problem is so severe and I dont know how to handle it. I have never been through anything like this, I dont know what to do. I cant turn my back on him because then I will go crazy, I worry what if he dies out in them streets. He robs and steals for his drug, and I am loosing sleep over this. What should I do?

my name is margo from san antonio tx i was an addict for 7 yrs cocain especialy i used herion every once in a while bu that cocain was my drug of choice i was in rehab twice and that didnt stop me when i met a man and got prganant then i changed my life i have been clean from that day forward thank the lord i was tired of kicking my selfeverday so ask for that strenth you have too so knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww. margo email me at mkr2102003@yahoo .com

I have read the different messages and I can Identify with some of the situations. I too am in Love with a crack addict and it hurts alot. I pray alot for him to wake up and see what he is doing to himself and others around him. He did live with me at one time and he was focused on staying clean. we went to church, took trips together and he worked everyday. then he started using again. this has been three years now and he just won't even try. I am ready to give up and forget spending my life with him. He is a wonderful man but, I cannot handle to pressure. I have never done drugs and I have never had an alcohol problem so, I don't know how powerful this crack is.I do know I have other family members that have gotten themselves messed up and they can't get it right either. I love this man but, apparently he love the drugs more.
I don't know whether I should wait for him to get it together.(I have tried to get him to go to the NA meetings) talk to a minister,somone, but he hasn't done either of them. but, yet he says he loves me and one day I will be his wife.
I need some advice. I am a strong individual and most of the time happy, but, this has goetten me confused.

I lost the love of my life to crack cocaine and the man she got invloved with. She went to jail for possession and when she got out & while she was there she professed her love for me. Stupid me I fell for her crap and now he is out and of course I've not heard from her and do not expect to either. I guess this should teach me a lesson about drug users/alcoholics. They can not be trusted. I'm hurt and sad, but I wish her well. I guess I should also pray and forgive her as the bible taught me.

I am really scared that I got serious with someone that might be in a relationship only to GET UNDER GUISE OF GIVING. I've known this man for many years. He was a friend when we were adolescents, but both had other love partners, etc. Our path crossed again in the last few years. Both of us have gone through bitterly miserable divorce. Two for him, the first for me.
*
My divorce isn't quite final yet and I am still fighting for my sanity (my ex-was psychoabusive)and it took me forever to figure this out. He was so subtle about it...I had to go through therapy to accept the truth.also there was nil/nix/nada/sex for ever, i.e. since we got married. it was a effort for both.*

Now, this guy Charlie, is charming, a good friend, but totally penniless, which puts him in the place where I have been more than willing and had made up my mind to take care of $$$$ when we got to go out do things together. This put me at a more controlling place, and that was AOK for me.

As things went, we spent a few days together and his sexxy charm worked better than I had anticipated. It was a sexual, reeeeee---awakening for me from the last two years of NADA.
Somehow I sense that for him it was great, but it is what he does to repay females for $dollar favors...I might be wrong, but my intuition is screaming that this is ssoooo.
The last conversation we had was cool, from his side. I am emotionally upset, hurt, and feel USED. In any event, I did get me some good sex>
I now feel like severing bonds, and letting him have a piece of my mind. I have a CHERREEYBYE letter in mind that spells out: we got what we both wanted thankyou and have a nice life.
The last quirk is that I would like to keep some friendship. But will face that it might not work.
Help me figure out if I am setting realistic boundaries, if moving from friends to lovers (which I had feared) even for a short time, screwed up any possible basis for contact. I.E.
SHOULD THE CUT BE SURGICAL??! THANKS FOR ANYHELP BRO. DEE DEE

Hello, my name is Angie and my fiance is a cocaine addict. We have been together for four years but his addiction didn't start until about a year ago. At first I didn't know he was using but I caught him sniffing in my bathroom. After I caught him he said that he would quit because he knew how much it upset me. I beleived that for a while but last night he picked me up and I could tell he had been using again. But when I asked him about it he denied it. I wanted to tell him to drop me off and leave but I couldn't. I love him so much and I hate to see him ruin his body and life. I need advise on how to get him to admit he has a problem and get him help. Everyday I cry because I get so frustrated I am now on medication because of his problem. I don't want to leave him because I think his habit will get worse. We don't live together so I can't always monitor his behavior. So I don't know when he is using or not. Please give me some advise on how to deal with my fiance. You can e-mail me if you like at AngieStreetfire at aol.com

Find out after talking to him about his childhood and some past years. He dint get enough love from his parents for sure.

People get to addictions to forget some internal pains. You can go deeper with him and help him while he is sober.

ed.

MARY I WENT THRU THE SAME THING AS WITH MY BOYFRIEND WITH HIM SWEET TALKING ME OUT OF MONEY ALL THE TIME TELLING ME THIS WAS HIS LAST BAG AND IT NEVER WAS AND IF I REFUSED THE MONEY HE WOULD JUST TAKE IT. I FINALLY LEFTED HIM AND I STILL LOVE HIM VERY MUCH BUT HE FINALLY WENT IN FOR TREATMENT RECENTLY CUZ HE SAID IT TOOK ME LEAVING HIM TO MAKE HIM WAKE UP TO HIS PROBLEM AND ALSO WITH ME DOIND THE TOUGH LOVE WITH HIM. I AM THANKFUL THAT I HAVE GREAT FRIENDS THAT ARE STANDING BESIDE ME THRU THIS CUZ I FEEL IF I DIDNT HAVE THEM I WOULD JUST PUT UP WITH IT. MARY IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO LET ME KNOW

Ok all you fabulous women out there.....lighten
up on the whole porn thing! Porn, like any
sexual fantasy, is just that, fantasy. It is not
intended to replace you, make you feel
inadequate, nor make you feel bad about
yourself.
As hard as this may be to accept....it isn't
about you at all. It isn't a contest with your
man casting the deciding vote....it is simply
fun. As a woman, I am totally cool with myself,
my body and my own sexuality. I learned a
while
back that porn and self-gratification are:
1. as old as the ages
2. non discriminating (it knows no boundries)
3. is a source of shame for most men.
Why embarass someone you love with critial
comments and sulking? Guess what? That
just
leads to more of the activities that you want to
curtail. Porn will never go away, it has always
been here and always will be. If you are
looking
for a man that never looks at porn, best of luck.
I personally find that a man that has a healthy
view of sex will enjoy looking at porn, some
more
frequently than others. Could you actually
allow
something this insignificant to ruin your
marriage? I hope not. Instead of allowing it to
drive a wedge between you, make it
something you
share in. It can add an entire new dimension
to
your sex life and you might find it fulfilling as
well. We are in the year 2002 and I would
hope
that both sexes would posess a more
heightened
tolerance for some porn...there are boundries
that one should honor. If you don't remember
anything else about what I have written,
remember
this: these females are airbrushed, their
pictures doctored to give the illusion of
perfection. That's all it (porn) has ever been
about..the illusion. Smile, you are beautiful
and oh by the way, you are real.

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